i know i should be resting or whatever, instead of blogging, but i just want to calm my nerves.

at around 7pm, after dinner, i dozed off in our lounge while watching tv. i felt a sudden pain in my tummy that woke me up. it was tolerable but still painful. it didnt last long. at half past seven, i felt something trickling down my pants. tantan and my mom thought it was just pee. i sometimes couldnt hold it in especially when i sneeze or when i laugh hard. but i said the fluid coming out was too much, i wet even my pj’s. my panty liner was soaked. and it didnt smell of urine. it smelt more like bleach.

i texted my midwife about it as i wasnt sure if it was my water that broke or just my plug. i had a slight “bloody show” earlier, before we went for the long walk, but it wasnt much. i thought that this was just a continuation of that. she told me to wear a thicker pad and to observe if it will happen again.

it did happen again. i ended up resorting to wearing a diaper because the leak was too much. too much that i had to change undies 3x, my pj’s and diapers 2x. all in a span of one hour. i only leak if i move. my midwife then asked me to go to the hospital so she can do some checks (fortunately, she was on duty).

we were at the hospital around 9pm. i was leaking like crazy!! i think i used up all of the examination room’s tissues (and it’s new!). she even gave me a new pad (mine are still in the car. we didnt bring my stuff upsairs in case i get sent home). she checked baby’s heartbeat (all fine). movements were felt. she did an IE and i was told im not yet dilated but it’s getting “thinner”. she sent me home but told me to observe and see if anything will happen. if not, i will be induced after 18hours.

im now home. i feel pain during contractions but i can still manage. i did some research and i read from the forums that since my water broke, i shouldnt have had a vaginal exam. it can cause infection. it can give baby an infection. and im now scared to death!

i hope my cervix will dilate quickly. i hope to give birth without having to be induced. if that happens, i wont be able to at least try the water birth i’ve been planning. they said induced labor is more painful. im sure i’ll scream for an epi if that happens.

pls pray that everything will be fine. i hope i give birth soon. for baby’s sake. thank you!